what to do when "it's not working" no matter what you do

podcast Jun 07, 2021

Do you feel like you're doing ~all the things~ but no matter what you do, nobody seems to want your offers? Do you feel like you should be making more money and can't seem to figure out why it's working for other coaches but not you? Do you sometimes feel like quitting because if it hasn't worked yet, why would it?

If you said yes to any of these questions, this episode is for you. I've been there and I know how painful and embarrassing it feels to have poured so much time, money and energy into a business that feels like it's not working and never will. But I promise, this doesn't have to last forever. You've got this. You always have; and you always will.


In this episode, you'll learn:

✧ Why there's nothing actually wrong with you 
✧  How to shift who you're being to open the door to the possibility
✧  How to stop telling the "it's not working" story
✧  How to free yourself from the 2 types of self-sabotage that show up when you're stuck in the "it's not working" mindset
✧  The most powerful analogy about divine timing that will give you goosebumps and bring you to tears
✧  How to collect evidence and train your brain to see that it is working
✧  How to step into sufficient, "good enough" energy so your mood isn't dependent on your business results
✧  How to let your intuition guide you in your business


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Full Episode Transcript:

Welcome to the magnetically youth podcast. My name is Madison certagen. I'm a master mindset coach and food freedom expert, you're in the right place. If you want to manifest a life It means you jump out of bed excited if every morning, reprogram your mind for success and happiness, feeling your best and become magnetic to everything that you desire. For me healing my relationship with food was my gateway into mindset, spiritual and personal development. And now I am obsessed. And I realized the same thing became true for so many of the women. I've coached through my course the subtle art of food freedom, and doing the inner work around food became about so much more than food for all of us. So that's what this podcast is really about that expansion, expanding that inner work to all areas of our life so that we can become the most magnetic confident versions of ourselves and achieve our biggest dreams. If you're like me, and you're obsessed with personal development, then you are going to love this podcast. So let's freakin do this.

Hi, and welcome back to the magnetically podcast, I am going to go freakin deep, deep, deep, deep, deep today, if you have you ever felt like especially in your business, but in life and something you're doing and a goal you're going after like it's just not fucking working. No matter what I do. Like, this is embarrassing, like, at what point should I just give up? Like I've been trying for so long? Like, this is like dumb, it's never gonna work, I should probably just like, give up now. And you know, forget about this stream, and it's just never gonna work no matter what I do. It just doesn't work. It's just not organic, nothing is working. Have you ever felt that way? Begin because I definitely have that was a huge theme of my 2020. Was that feeling so stuck? In this it's not working story. And what I did was I would collect evidence all day every day. If it's not working. Someone would say no to coaching, I would say, oh, that means it's not working. Yep, brain. You're correct. I, what else, just things like that every little thing, every little thing that would happen, oh, that means it's not working. Someone would book a discovery call and then decide not to coach up, that means it's not working. Instead of like, Wait a second, there's people interested, it's working. So it's just how it's how we're framing it. And this it's not working frame seeps into everything that we do, into our mindset into our energy into our identity into how we're showing up. And it just continues to perpetuate evidence in our reality that confirms our belief system, that it's not working. And there's nothing wrong with you. If your brain is doing this. It's completely normal. Our brains are designed to seek evidence to re enforce our current belief systems. And we're going to talk more about collecting new evidence later on this podcast. So this is not about fixing something wrong with you or broken in your business. A lot of times when we think it's not working, we think well Oh, it's working for everyone else. Like why is it not working? For me? Like I did all the same things they did. And like, it's not working for me like what the fuck, like literally Something must be wrong with me. Clearly, I'm doing it wrong. Clearly, something has gone wrong, right? We make it mean something about us, we make it mean that something has gone wrong. What if nothing has gone wrong? What if there's nothing wrong with you? And there's not. So this isn't about fixing something that's wrong, we have to drop that idea that something has gone wrong, that something is wrong with us. That's just another story. This is about being the version of you, who actually knows that there's nothing wrong with you. Being the version of you who knows there's actually nothing wrong with the results you currently have in your life or business being the version of you who is living for today, and how can I enjoy my day today being the version of you who is not chasing the results and waiting to live until they have the results being the version of you who's living today? How can I love today? How can I enjoy today? How can I be who I want to be today? Who do I want to be today? Do I want to be the person who's you know waiting and waiting and waiting for the results and letting the results dictate who I am what I get to have how I get to feel what I think about myself and everything in my life or do I I want to be the person who says, I'm going to enjoy today, no matter what I'm going to show up today, no matter what I'm all in no matter what, because that's who I want to be. That's how I want to live my day, today, tomorrow, the next day. And we have to be the version of ourselves that allows it all to be okay. This is a big one. And this was a huge, huge, huge shift for me and letting this story and cycle go. When you are willing to feel any emotion, you're willing to put yourself in front of any experience, you're willing to actually receive the impulses from your intuition your you allow yourself to actually act on them. You show up in different ways you put yourself in front of different opportunities, different people, different experiences,

what if it's all okay? The worst thing that can ever happen in business is that something happens, and then we have an emotion about it, the worst thing that can happen is an emotion. So are we going to let the potential for an emotion rule our life in this moment? Are we going to let it be in the driver's seat? Are we going to let it dictate us? Or are we going to say, MB, I'm the version of me, I'm the person who can handle it all. If I get rejected, I can handle that. If someone changes their mind about working with me, I can handle that. If I'm not seeing any interest, if people want to work with me, I can handle that. What if you're not showing up, because you want to get those results. And you're showing up because you're showing up in the way that you want to be you're showing up as a you you want to be? What if it's worth it to show up as who you want to be, just for the sake of this is who I want to be when we're waiting on the results. We're always waiting on the results. When you're waiting on the results. Now, you're always waiting on the results when you're waiting on 10k months, and then you get to 10k months and you're waiting on 20 months, then you are waiting on 30 and you're you're waiting forever, you're waiting forever to allow yourself to feel successful, you're waiting forever to allow yourself to decide. It's enough. When is it enough? What has to happen? In order for it to be working? How will you know when it's working? When you've made $1,000? When you've one client two clients, three, when you've made 5000 when you made 5100? When you've made $6,781.25? All of a sudden boom? Yes. Okay. Now I know it's working. At what point there is no point there is going to there is going to be no moment outside of you, that tells you Okay, now you can believe it's working. It's not happening. So you have to decide within yourself. what's already happened, it was all working what's happening. Now it's working everything that happens in the future, it's all working. You got it, we have to change our definition of working because if working is this unbeatable definition, then we're going to be on a chase for the rest of our lives. If working is always something and that we're going to have in the future that we got to get to. We're going to be in this perpetual state of not there yet. Not good enough. Got to get there. Something's wrong with me not there yet. It's not working. And that is not a fun way to live. I like feel that in my body right now. I'm like, Oh my gosh, it just hurts hurts. It's hard, tired to be with all of these thoughts and emotions that we have as entrepreneurs, and a lot of people don't talk about it. That's the real shit. Okay. So the first thing was, it's about who you're being what if you could be the version of you who knows that there's actually nothing wrong with you, there's actually nothing wrong, be who you want to be and live how you want to live now because that's who you want to be. And that's how you want to live not because you think if I be this way, then I'll get the result. It's like we're trying to like mold ourselves to be the right person for the result. Well, I just recorded an Instagram Live on this the other day. It's like, what if just by being new, you're inherently a vibrational match for everything you desire. This is what I truly believe. I truly believe this just by being ourselves. And following our inner nudges our heart, our soul, we are inherently a vibrational match to everything we desire. So when we're trying to be so hard, something else to be the right, the right thing to get the thing to be like, I need to be this so I can get this I need to do this so I can get this. We're molding ourselves into something that's not actually aligned with our soul. So of course the things that we are inherently a perfect vibrational match for are not matching with us because we're being and molding ourselves and trying to like, squeeze ourselves into something that we're not. So it's like if you're a puzzle Piece matching your puzzle piece.

And you have this shape and you have these like, you know the different things that like poke out on the sides. Other puzzle pieces naturally fit with your puzzle piece. But when you are trying to be the right way so that you can get the thing or be someone you're not or, or be what everyone else is telling you you have to be or be more than you are because who you are is not enough, you change the shape of your puzzle piece. And the things that were a vibrational match naturally to magnetically you are no longer matching, they're not matching, they're still there, they're just not matching up, you're not seeing them in your reality. So you we can allow ourselves to just be who we are follow our intuition. And the things that we're a vibrational match for inherently get to come to us, when we allow everything about who we are to be okay to be enough. When we allow all the emotions everything coming up. It's the opening for so much more possibility to opening for listening to those nudges. So that was the first thing to being. The second thing is stop telling the story and changing letting go of that definition of working like, Is it going to be the $7,000.08 910? When will it be working? They will never be working. If your story is it's it never works. So you get to decide right now today it's working. It's always working. Who fucking cares? If you feel like that's a lie. But But I don't have the money. And it's not that. Who cares? Who fucking cares?

What if?

What if you just say, yes, it's working that and that doesn't mean that you're a liar. That doesn't mean you're delusional. That doesn't mean that it's going to somehow stop you from like getting more later that or that it's going to squash all your motivation. If I if I did start working now. And it's actually not working now, then will I ever be able to get to the place where it is working? No, it's working today. It's working tomorrow. It's working the next day, it gets to all be working. Okay. So the third thing I want to talk about is what I was reading this book, we'll call it learned helplessness, because that's what it's called, like in psychology. So I was reading this book the other day called essentialism. And he talked about this thing called learned helplessness where basically these, there's this experiment where horses are like, put in this thing where they get shocked. And there's a button if they press the button, it stops them from getting shocked. So for the horses, who the button works for it, oh, they press the button, they stop getting shocked. Everything's good. Some of the horses are put with a button that doesn't work. So they're pressing the button. And they're getting shocked. And they're like, why is this button not working? Oh my gosh, it's not working. So they get they get shocked and they learn. Doesn't matter anyways, may as well not press the button, it doesn't doesn't work anyways, might as well just sit here and take the shock. So that's what they do. So then they move the horses, the ones who learned that the button doesn't work. I may as well not try anyways, because the button doesn't work. They put them in this I don't know thing where there was like two sides of the thing on one side, they were getting shocked. And the horses who the button worked for. They just walked over to the other side of the of the we'll call it the room where there was no shock because they felt empowered, like oh, I can press the button I can walk over I can be empowered about stopping the shock, right? The horses who the button didn't work for, just stood there that if they scooted over to more feet, they went the sharks would have stopped but they didn't even try. Because they you know, no might as well it doesn't work anyways, when I press the button, it doesn't work got to just sit here and take it. So this is what he calls learned helplessness. We have experiences in our life, where it seems like no matter what we do, the thing doesn't work. So either two things happen. And this resonated with me so deeply from the book, because that was like, Oh my gosh, that's exactly what I told my coach and our first session in December that I was doing. So the first thing is that we self sabotage, and we hide and we don't show up. Oh, well. It's not gonna work anyways. Why press the fucking button when I know it doesn't work. Why skewed over when I know it doesn't work? Nothing I do works. Why? Try it? I know it's not gonna work. Why would I? Why the fuck would I waste my time and energy doing it? So the first thing I want you to get deep with and journal on and I want if this is something that you're struggling with, like, do this intentional work, do the journal practices. really listen, really let yourself let this sink in. Let today be the day that everything shifts for you let this moment be the moment that you're fucking done with the story that it's not working. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. Done that chip. So be Who do you want to be? Do you want to be the person that who's willing to open herself up to that idea? who's willing to make that decision today? Who's open that that's actually how fast it can happen. It's just a decision like that today. Okay? So for sure, it'll pop I want you to do. And you're gonna do that, write them down, and then do them all at the end or pause the episode and do as you go, where am I not doing? Because I've already decided it won't work. So maybe there's, you know, actions you've been called to take that you're just not doing because you've already decided it won't work. Maybe you're not making any offers on your social media platform are in your business at all, because it's not going to work anyways. So where are you not showing up? Where are you not doing the things you know, you want to do not the things you should do the things you feel aligned to do the things you want to do. The things you know, will serve you Where are you not doing those things? Because you've already decided it won't work? Get really fucking honest with yourself. Okay.

So some of the ways that I self sabotage, when I noticed myself in this pattern, so last year, in July, I had like a $4,000 month, and it was more than I had ever made in my business at that point. And I freaked the fuck out. Because I was so in the it's not working story, that it was like so in comprehensible to my brain that I could have made $4,000 and I, I freaked out, I couldn't hold it, I was not the being the person who can hold this money, this success this, these opportunities. So, and I didn't realize all this until like six months later. But what I did was I did all sorts, the self sabotaging everything, everything my brain could possibly think of sabotage it. I did. So I hid under divine timing and surrender. I was just like, Oh, it's just divine timing. That's why, you know, nothing's happening. Like, oh, I'm just gonna like, I'm just gonna like surrender and let things come to me. Which I would say I do now. But it's different when it's coming from a place of self sabotage. And you'll notice that it'll hit differently if you know you're doing that. So I started hiding under, oh, I'm just surrendering. Actually, I was hiding. I changed my discovery call process to an application. Because if I had the application, and I, and I made them say, Are you basically the applications that something like are? This is the price like, are you ready to for this investment? Yes or no? So I figured, oh, well, no one's going to apply if they're not a yes. So I'm only going to get yeses and I won't have to deal with any nose, I want to be rejected. And I want to get on the call with people and face their no on the call right total hiding from the possibility of rejection. I don't think applications are bad. But for me, it was it's very clear looking back that it was coming from a place of heightening, I changed. I was changing everything all the time discovering all the application, changing my prices, changing the copy on my website, you want to coach on this, I want to go on that. I want to do this webinar, I want to do this master class, I want to do this, I want to do that. changing, changing, changing, changing everything. And I thought I really thought I'm doing all the things. I'm doing all the things why is it not working? But looking back? I was hiding. I was hiding so much. So be honest with yourself. Are you really showing up? And I don't mean do more, because you do not have to do more? Are you really showing up? Or are you hiding. And then the second thing that can happen with learned helplessness, which I also did. So the first thing is like the self sabotage, kind of like this, like giving up energy because it's not going to work anyways. The other thing that can happen is overcompensating over overdoing, because you don't believe it will ever be enough. You don't believe what you're doing is enough. So you overcompensate with more doing more things more? Oh, I gotta do this, I gotta get I gotta do that. So you can try to convince yourself that you're doing enough, but you're never convinced. So you just keep doing doing doing more, were more overcompensating? So this is the second journal prompt, I want you to answer where am I overcompensating? Because I don't believe it will ever be enough. And I'm actually gonna see if I can look up my notes with my coach from December when we talked about this, cuz that would be fairly fun to share. Okay, I'm going to keep going and, okay, I can't find it, but maybe we'll come back to it. Okay,

so, the two journal prompts for the learned helplessness part is where am I not doing where am I not showing up because I've already decided it won't work. What am I avoiding? Because I've already decided it won't work. And where am I overcompensating because I don't believe it will ever be enough. Okay, third thing to journal on I want you to do, what Brooke has to call is a thought, download, write down everything, everything your brain is telling you about, it's not working, right? Play that, let that story play out on paper or say it to yourself in a voice note, just get it out everything, all of it messy, put it out there, let it all come out, just let it rip, let it rip all of it, all of the thoughts, put them out there. And then what I want you to do is read them back, let yourself have awareness over them. And then think about then journal on or say out loud. If this was a sweet, innocent child, someone you really, really loved. What would you tell them? What would you tell them about all these thoughts? How would you comfort them? How would you? How would you sue them? How would you love them to do that? Do this soothing. First, let yourself feel the emotions if you for my clients, you guys know how to do the emotional beanbag release from the inner voice sessions, do that whenever beanbags are coming up. After you do all these thoughts, do the emotional beanbag release. For those of you who don't know what that is, lay down, breathe and feel what emotions are coming up in your body. See what sensations are coming up in your body. Just look at them as sensations. Give yourself a hug. soothe yourself, right give yourself some soothing, some comfort like you would a sweet little child or your best friend. And then I want you to journal on or voice out loud to yourself. What would you say to the sweet child or your friend? someone you love so dearly about all of this? Why would you tell them and then I want you to if you journal that out, read it back to yourself and receive it, feel it in your body feel the comfort that you're the reassurance that everything's going to be okay. In your body. Okay, then the next thing I want you to do, I told you this guy, this episode was going to be deep. This is not surface level shit. And this is actually I wrote I made an outline of I wanted to send my client one of my clients this message on boxer. And most of this was I wrote out to send to her. And then I realized, I think some other people need to hear this. So I turned it into a podcast episode. So we're getting really deep. Do the deep work, okay. Okay, so then you've done the thought download, you do the soothing. You write what you would say to a child or a loving friend about this, and then you read it back to yourself and receive it. The next thing I want you to do is to look at all the thoughts and choose new beliefs for each of the thoughts choose a new belief, what is my new belief I'm choosing today. So write down all your new beliefs. And if you've got listened to this point in the episode, it might serve you to pause and really go, go do the journal prompts that we've already talked about, and then come back and listen to the rest or, or take notes on what the activities are. And then do them all at the end. I cannot say enough times, like, please, please do do the things. Okay, so I'm gonna write out your new beliefs.

And then what I want you to do is decide, these are my new beliefs, read them back to yourself and feel them in your body with the intention that this is the moment these become my new beliefs. Just read, read them received them, feel. feel it in your body, choose to feel it in your body create sensations in your body. With this intention, the intention is enough to allow you to create that anchor of the sensations in the body. And then what you can do, if you want to take it to the next level, is record your new beliefs in an audio recording, send them to your coach and as you're reading them, reading them with the intention that these are my new beliefs. This is who I am, share them with a friend, share them with your coach, record them on an audio recording for yourself. Listen to it in the morning, add music to it, maybe you want to listen to it in the mornings for the next week. Get creative. How can I anchor in these new beliefs? How can I feel these? How can I feel these beliefs? Okay. Okay, the next piece I want to share with you, I think is going to hit freaking home. So I was watching it's about divine timing. I was watching Melania and layers invested masterclass last night. She has a brand called alpha them, and she's my coaches, coaches coach. And she's awesome. Her story is really, really incredible. She basically went from being homeless living in her car to now making I think it's like 10 or $12 million a year through her coaching business. So she knows her stuff. And she has a really beautiful way of sharing it. So I'm going to read to you a post from her on Instagram that she shared. So here it is. And if it speaks to you, you can honestly I would do this like a meditation, I would like lay down or sit down and close your eyes like decide, like listen to this when you're going to be so present. So in tune with what I'm saying. So in the receiving mode, so let's just take a deep breath in, and then exhale. The lessons we're meant to learn, will always find their way to us through the path of least resistance in our lives. When we live in alignment, okay, I'm actually going to rewind because there's a part of the story that I want to share with you. So she goes to Hawaii, this is the background of the story. She goes to Hawaii and her it was either boyfriend or husband wanted to go to the dole pineapple farm. And she was like, kind of just like, Oh my gosh, it's like a tourist trap, like really, but whatever. Like, he wants to go to the pineapple farm and I love him. So I'm gonna go, it's gonna be great. And so they go to the pineapple farm. And this is a post that she wrote after leaving the pineapple farm, that she thought, Oh, this is just a tourist thing. And then it became the, this huge, huge shift and lesson in her life. Okay, so here we go.

The lessons we're meant to learn, will always find their way to us through the path of least resistance in our lives. When we live in alignment with our purpose and deepest desires, when we learn to lead ourselves with love, curiosity, and a willingness to learn, right where we least expect them. There they are. They show up in a conversation with a stranger. In a social media post. They show up in the middle of nature, when we're ready to hear the messages come. Here is something Hawaii taught me. pineapples take 18 months to grow one pineapple per plant at a time. Once it's ready to be picked, the same plant can produce a second pineapple. This one will take a year to grow. Once the pineapple has birth to pineapples, it is an uprooted and a new seed is planted in its place. It takes longer to create a pineapple than a human baby. In fact, up to twice as long. We often question the timing of the universe. We even give up on our dreams, because they don't seem to come to fruition as fast as we believe they should. But what if we chose to trust that every everything in our life has a perfectly aligned harvest time that we cannot see what is growing in the crops beneath us. But that magic is happening, that Mother Nature God, the universe, they have heard us they have received the seed that the mindset we want our thoughts with and the rays of sun and hope that warmer hearts and dreams are strengthening us and aligning us with the people, places and circumstances we desire. I believe the life we create is like an ecosystem. Everything has a place and a purpose. Some things regenerate quicker than others. Some operate on a different timing. If you've been worried your dreams aren't manifesting as quickly as you desire. Please remember the fruits of your labor are on the way you planted those seeds however long ago and golden fruits with crowns are worth being patient for Pinnacle season is coming. Oh my goodness. I was like, Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, complete shift. shuck when she read me that I hope. I hope you're feeling that in your body, too. I hope you're feeling the truth of it. The peace in it the comfort in that the patience the understanding the acceptance, in this message, the magic of this message. So how long? How long do we water a plant before we start to see something? How long do we water the paddles and before we start to see something, the person who planted the pineapple the first person to ever discover it had to be 18 months to water it for 18 months. But they didn't know a pineapple was going to come. So who it's this is goes back to the first thing when I talked about inception. Who are we being who am I when the seed is in the ground and it hasn't started sprouting up yet. Who Are you when the seed is in the ground, who do I want to be while the seed is in the ground? For pineapples, they have to water a soil that is pineapple list. This is what Melanie said, they have to water a soil that is pineapple less, to the visual eye for a year and a half before they can have a pineapple. And it's like, you know, we're like, oh, if it was gonna work, it would have worked by now, if the pineapple was gonna come, it would have come by now, a whole year and still no fucking pineapple Come on, it's not gonna happen. You have to keep going. Even when you can't see it. Even when you have no evidence that there's a pineapple even when you have no evidence that it's quote working, you have to hunter it, keep watering it, keep going, keep going no matter what. That's how the pineapple comes. That's if you water for 18 months, a pineapple will come. And I'm not saying everything in your life has to be 18 Plus, now, but you have to live knowing and live in the knowing that there is a pineapple under there, you planted the seed, you're watering it, there is a fucking pineapple coming. You have to live in that knowing you get to live in that knowing. And you got to leave it leave it there.

Right We like this is what I was doing with myself sabotage, I was like, Oh, I'm gonna do a discovery call, I'm gonna do the application and I'm gonna change my price. It's like, I would plant the seed and rip it out plant the cedar, but I'll plant seed, rip it up live seed rip it up. Well, pineapple doesn't grow if you keep ripping the seed out. Okay. So it's like, at what point? At what point do I give up? How long do I have to wait for the pineapple? How long is too long? How much investing in myself is to investing? When do I give up? When do I decide? Yeah, it's never gonna fucking work. The whole point is that you never do. You never decide that it's never time, it's never time to give up. You keep going. And you get to shift the reason why you've invested so much time, so much money, so much energy into your business or project or whatever you're doing. You're not investing because you're trying to fix something wrong with you. You're investing in you in yourself in something that you believe is going to grow for the rest of your life, because you're going to keep going no matter what, therefore, you're the investment. You're gonna keep going no matter what. So what else did I want to share about this? Yeah, it's about being invested. No matter what, oh, I'm only invested, I'm only willing to keep going, I'm only willing to believe it's working when if I don't have to sell. Or if people are buying, then I'll keep going. Or if I have 200 people show up to my Instagram Live, then I'll do an Instagram Live. If

I have 10 clients, I'll show up for my clients. But if I have one, I don't want them.

So are you invested? Are you conditionally invested? Are you conditionally showing up? I'll show up if this all show up? If I get that result, are you is your Are you is your level of investment in you and your business conditional on the results? What if you decided that you were a message no matter what I'm in it no matter what. There are no conditions. I'm in it no matter what. So I thought about this like the stock market. And there's a couple different kind of coaches that will relate back to the stock market. So are you going to be the coach who never cashes out of the stock market? Who's in it for a lifetime of growth that has no ending? But if What if that's what life is there's no cash out? Are you willing to go on that journey? Are you willing? If not, if there is no cash out, then the journeys worth that? So are you willing to enjoy the journey now? Or are you the coach who cashes out when the stock market dips? Who's only in it? conditionally who's only in it? As long as there are no dips or no hard moments? It got hard eat someone's a no cash out checkout? Or are you the coach who never invest in the stock market in the first place? Who isn't even willing to play the game? Because why bother? If it won't work anyways? Why bother? If I'm going to get rejected? Why bother? I'm going to fail. So what if there's never a cash out moment? Are you still in? Are you still in? Are you still willing to keep going anyways, Melanie is said to buy coaches so she coaches by Coaches coach, um, I used to getting so mad. But she said to her one time I am on a picklist mountain, I've decided I'm on an evolution for a lifetime. This mountain has no peak, I'm on the mountain. I'm climbing up the whole time I have one foot going up and one foot planted in gratitude and loving the now and looking at the view and seeing how amazing it is where I'm at. So what if there's never a cash out moment? Are you still in it? What if there's no peak? Are you still in it? Are you still willing to keep going? Is it? Why is it worth it? Why is it still worth it? If there's no peak? Why is it still worth it? If there's no cash out moment? So newsflash, there is no cash out moment, there is no peak, there is no getting there. It's not about cashing out. It's not about getting there. It's about who you become through the ups and downs. It's about the growth, the evolution, the journey, every single step of the way, letting the climb be the most beautiful part. So I really, I really hope you allow that to really land with you really sink in, because

some powerful shit.

Okay, I have three more things to share with you. So the next thing, collect evidence of who you want to be, who you're becoming who you decide that you are now. And I want you to now add everything you can think of to this list of why it's working. Why is it working? And it doesn't have to be just results. It's it's working, because I'm having so many emotions bubble up to the surface that obviously, I'm releasing a lot of shits coming up to come out like this is working. So well. Look at all these emotions coming up. Look at how much more awareness I have over my thoughts. So it's internal things too. You can put the external things, but the internal things to why it is working. And then let this be an ongoing list for I would say at least the next two weeks, keep an ongoing list every day, add to it every day find something to add to it to give meaning to it is working. Someone liked my Instagram post. It's working. I showed up on Instagram Live even though I was afraid. It's working. I wrote an Instagram post. It's working. I had someone tell me they're interested in my coaching. Even though they said no later, it's still working. There's interest. It's working. There's demand. There's obviously demand people obviously want this. It's working. I listened to this podcast from Madison. And I decided it was a shift. I felt a shift. I felt it in my body. I felt that analogy she does their shared. It's working. That was a breakthrough. It's working.


So let yourself build the evidence. Your brain is wanting to filter and delete and distort out everything that will allow you to believe it's working because it wants to be quote, right? That's how our brains operate. It's not like it's not like you're a bad person you just want to be right it's like no, that's just how our brains work. So nothing has gone wrong. Your brain is doing its job. And now you could do intentionally lead your brain lead your brain to new evidence look for new evidence. What What am I day today? Can I make mean it is working? Okay, find it the evidence is there if you're willing to look for it if you're willing to see it if you're willing to acknowledge it. Do not tell yourself the lie. Oh there is no evidence medicine Easy for you to say you decided to attend came on. Don't do that shit to yourself. The evidence is there. The evidence is there. So who this is about who are you going to be when you're watering the seed? Are you going to look for all the ways that it's the pineapples never going to come? Are you going to look for all the ways it is? I watered it I watered the seed today. So it's coming yeah I feel so good about I'm so proud of myself for watering the seed but if you are proud of yourself for showing up when you're proud of yourself for the courageous actions What if you're proud of yourself? We're continuing to go keep going before the results come What if you allow yourself to feel how you want to feel before before the results come but if it's safe to allow yourself to feel those feelings now what if you don't have to wait? What if feeling them now has no doesn't stop you from getting there. It just allows you to feel better now. And you're allowed to feel better now. Okay, so the next thing, start your evidence list right now actually started right now. And then you can keep it in your phone on a piece of paper wherever you want to. And I would add to it throughout the day. I wouldn't wait for the end of the day because your brain will delete so much That happened during the day, all day, all day, let yourself receive evidence and add it to your list. Okay? The next thing is to practice sufficient energy. This is like I am good enough energy. So I want you to think about, like, where in your life do you feel good enough? Do you feel sufficient? For me when I was like struggling with this in my business last year? I thought about like, Okay, well, how did I do this with food? Because that's where my personal development journey started with becoming an intuitive eater going from thinking and worrying and obsessing, and freaking out about food all the time to being completely confident for your own food. So I'm like, what has allowed me to feel good enough in my body? What allowed me to feel good enough? In my food choices? How am I showing up in that area? Who am I being in terms of my relationship with food? How am I sufficient? What does my level of being looked like? That makes me What is it about my being in that area of my life that makes me feel good enough, that makes me feel sufficient, that doesn't feel the need to question and overthink everything. And think nothing's working. So I started practicing practicing that in my business. Okay, where else do I feel good enough? insufficient? And how can I practice that feeling with my business? So this is like, you know, it's the food and body analogy really kind of like lands very well. It's all our brains just look for a chew toy. So your toy here brains to toy could be like, Oh, you know, obsessing over your weight and you get on the scale in the morning. And it's like, my day is ruined three pounds up. 10 pounds up, ruined, to bounce down. Good. It's

a good day,

when pat down had a great day. 10 pounds out?

Well, it's a good day, three pounds up, it's a bad day or two pounds down. It's a good day, up, down, up, down.

So I can whiplash the scale. It's giving you emotional and mental whiplash, up down, up down the scale is fuckin like, grabbing you and putting you through the wringer and shaking you up. You're letting the scale do that to you. Same thing, if, with business, you're letting outside forces give you mental and emotional whiplash. Those outside forces don't get to decide that you get to decide that you get to put yourself back in the driver's seat. You get to put yourself back in leading energy, leading energy is Who do I want to be in this moment? How am I going to show up in this moment? What would it feel like me leading my life? What do I want to experience right now in this moment? Who do I want to be right now in this moment, practice, practice that practice. The leading practice the the being of I am good enough. I am sufficient. If I'm sufficient, if I'm good enough. What do I want to do in this moment? Who do I want to be knowing that I'm sufficient? Knowing that I'm good enough? How am I gonna show up today? Who am I going to be today? To practice, practice, practice this, it's a practice. Okay. And then the last thing I'll share is follow your inner voice. follow your intuition even when it doesn't make sense. This is how you build trust with yourself. When you build trust with yourself, you're not constantly wondering, is it going to work is it not? Because you're in like Cahoots, you're in cahoots, so closely with your inner voice and intuition. And you listen to it, you listen to a follow the nudges. And you realize it's all okay, you realize you can handle it all. You trust yourself more, and then you follow the next nudge. And it all turns out, okay, and you realize you're okay, and realize you can handle it all. And you trust yourself more when you follow the next nudge. Right? It's building that practice of trust building that practice of listening to your intuition, even if it makes no fucking sense. Okay, so let go of all the ways you think you have to get to the successful business all the ways you think of all the things you think you have to do to get clients. If that's not having, it's not that's not fine and you feel like it's not working anyways, then why are you fucking doing it? What if you follow the nudges, even if when they didn't make sense? What if you followed what fell? Fine, what felt expansive what felt light, even if it didn't seem to relate to the creating of the results? Okay, so that is all I would love to hear how this episode landed for you. I think this is like something a lot of us struggle with in business. So there's so much there's so many people online, it's so easy to compare ourselves. It's so easy to feel like we're getting something wrong when there's coaches out there saying like, I followed these three steps and I made $100,000. And if and then you follow those three steps and you're like, what the fuck I didn't make $100,000 something is wrong with me, right? Like, it's easy to fall into these patterns to fall into these feelings to fall into the comparison Nothing is wrong with you Nothing has gone wrong this is all completely normal. This is all normal. The only thing you need to do is to keep going keep going allow yourself to enjoy the now allow yourself to enjoy the journey allow yourself to have fucking fun stop waiting stop waiting to get there to feel successful to have fun to be who you want to be be who you want to be now live how you want to live now how can you make today fun How can you make today matter more? How can you make today meaningful? How can you feel fulfilled today? How can you lead your energy today? So I'll leave you with that. Anyways, I would love to hear what he came up with for you if you want to share Feel free to DM me on Instagram at magnetically you if there's someone who you know this episode will serve please share it with them you can share on your Instagram stories and tag me that would mean the world to me. So thank you so much. And I really hope that you this message shifted things for you today. I hope you leave right now. anchoring in the decision This is the ship this is the turning point. I'm done. I'm done with that old story. I'm all in I'm all in no matter what decide that now let it sink and now. Thank you so much. And I will see you in the next episode.

I'm so grateful for you listening today if this resonated with you it would mean the world to me if you'd hit subscribe and then leave a review on iTunes and everybody is invited to the after party which takes place every day on Instagram I medically up so come hang out with us there. And if you're really fired up about mindset, spiritual and personal development, head to magnetically your comm to check out all the fun stuff I have going on there like my coaching, and my courses, free workshops, all the good stuff and I will see you on the next episode.

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