why “it’s not working” is a LIE keeping you stuck (and how to release it)

podcast Sep 07, 2020

"It's not working" is a LIE that's keeping you stuck.⁠

What even is "working"? Who decides when it's "working" or when "it's not"? ⁠

I realized the other day that i was believing that in order to deem my business as "working", I had to be making over $10k a month and since I wasn't hitting those numbers (YET 😉), i decided to make it mean that what I was doing wasn't working. ⁠

But this mindset leads to a never ending chase to be somewhere I'm not. If I have to get "there" in order for things to be "working", then it will never be "working" and I'll always feel disappointed and not good enough in the present and that's DEF not the vibe I want to live in forever.⁠

So i did some deep dive journaling around this belief and I'm sharing all of my breakthroughs in this episode!

⁠If you've been telling yourself "it's not working" and feeling discouraged, always wondering what the heck you're doing wrong, YOU'VE GOTTA LISTEN to this week's podcast episode!


In this episode, you'll learn:

✧ why "it's not working" is actually an illusion keeping you stuck in fear and self-sabotage
✧ what's actually happening when it feels like things aren't "working"
✧ what you're missing out on by believing "it's not working"
✧ how to choose and step into a more empowering mindset so you can attract ideas and opportunities (instead of staying stuck in self-doubt)


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Full Episode Transcript:

Welcome back to The magnetically you podcast. I can't wait to record this episode. So this is something that has been bubbling up and bubbling up to the surface. The last few months as I've been like massively up leveling and growing, which I'm also going to be recording in a podcast episode on today and how like, I realized that me being in a funk the last month was actually more of an expansion and a spiritual awakening and wasn't actually a funk. The funk was just like my brains way of trying to like, take me back to old patterns and paradigms, but that's going to be a separate episode. So anyways, this was one of the kind of like core mindsets that was holding me back and it was been it's been coming to the surface and coming to the surface, like, it's like my body and my brain are like, okay, Madison, like you're ready to release this. We're kind of keep like bringing this up until you like do the work to releases. So it's this whole mindset of like that we love to tell ourselves that, at least if you're anything might like me that it's not working, nothing is working. It's not working like bla bla bla bla bla. But this is a lie, and it's keeping you stuck. So, in this episode I want to talk to you about the deep, deep deep dive journaling I did on this this morning and how I reframed it, how I'm how I've been releasing this mindset and how I'm really stepping into this new belief that like, everything is fucking working, it's fine and I was just going, I just went downstairs to grab a coffee from the coffee shop below our apartment and I was like boxing, one of my friends back and telling, telling her all of my epiphanies about this and I was like ranting and ranting, and I just started like getting all fired up and excited. I'm like, it's fucking working, everything is fucking working. It's perfect. And this guy walks by, um, I was like standing near the elevator like walking back up with my coffee and this guy walks by and like, looks at me like I'm like total batshit crazy. Um, but it's fine. It made me. It made me laugh. But anyway, so I'm very, very passionate about this. I had some really, really big breakthroughs on this mindset that I want to share with you today because it's not working. It's a fucking lie. So basically, this, this mindset belief, like when I asked myself, like, where does this come from? Like, where is this thought coming from that? It's not working and it's one coming from assigning meaning to past experiences, right? Like, okay, well in the past, I made X amount of money, so therefore, I can only make that amount of money now. And if I'm not making the amount more than that, then it's not working for me. Whatever it is, it's just assigning meaning to past experiences. Well, I did this in the past and it, quote, didn't work and by what is didn't work mean anyways, it's like, okay, it didn't get you the result you wanted but like, what meaning Did you assign it, that it didn't work? So it's assigning meaning to past experiences. And then also, it's about your definition of it working. So what is in order for you to deem things as working? Like what has to happen? Like what the fuck does that even mean? So, is that definition keeping you trapped? Like what is required? I want you to journal on this like what will it take in order for you to tell yourself things are working in order for you to believe that things are working what is required? And for me when I thought about this I was like well I don't know it was just like it's not working it's just like a totally made up thought there was there wasn't even really a definition behind it. So if it's like I don't know what it means if it's working or not, then is it possible that it is working? And like what if you know like, what if? What if your definition is like this never ending unmaintainable chase towards the future like so if your definition for things to be like so you recently maybe you started a business and you're making $1,000 a month? Well is it Your mind is not working until you're making $10,000 a month. And according to who? And how do you know? It's not working until 10? k? And like, what if? What if say you do get to that 10 k a month and you're still stuck with this mindset that it's not working. And then you're on this constant Chase, of getting to working. And it's always somewhere you can't get because you're always trying to go somewhere. You're not like running from the present. Does that make sense? Like, it's not working comes from trying to live in the future. Everything right here right now, in this moment is fucking working. It's only not working when we believe it should be different than it is. What is it just fucking is and it's working because that's what it is. It just is. And it's now and it's here. But when we try to go out into prison predicting the future or we look at what the future should be and how things are not that way now than we deem them as not working now, but it's like do you want to live your whole life? Always thinking things should be different than they are now. And waiting, waiting your whole life for things to be working and because you've created this unreadable, like elusive standard of what working means, you're never going to get to feel like it's working. And guess what? When you never get to feel like it's working, it makes you feel stuck. It makes you feel stressed. It blocks like feeling good. It blocks like inspired ideas, it probably is repelling what you want, it's probably making it take a lot longer to get what you want. And like, if there's always like, the next thing that you have to achieve in order for it to be working, then according to your definition, it will never be working and like is that the mindset you want to live in? Right? So what we need to do is we have to change our definition of what means for things to be working. So I want you to like think about now like, Okay, what is your current? What is your current like requirements and rules around what it will take in order for things to be working? And like, is that absolutely true? And like is it just all made up anyways? Very like if the definition of it's not working, or it is working is totally made up and like, why don't you make it up in a way that like, makes you feel good about yourself and makes you feel inspired and makes you want to move forward right then, rather than that it's not working energy that keeps you stuck in victim mentality and keeps you just yeah, just not moving forward. So I want to talk through some of the journaling that I did on this because I basically wrote out like six pages of journaling, just like talking myself through this and really wrapping my mind around, okay, this is a complete illusion. It's a complete lie. It's time to let it go and it's time to step into the belief that like, everything is working perfectly as it is. So, um, let me I'm looking back through it kind of like what came up. So okay, so I want you to think about like when you tell yourself, it's not working, how do you react? What What goes, what happens for me when I feel like it's not working, I feel shut down, I feel defeated, I start worrying. I start trying to like, quote, fix things. If I believe that the things I'm doing are wrong, or the things I've created are wrong, so therefore, I get into all this fixing introduce and wasting time fixing things that actually probably don't need fixing. And it's like this energy of trying to control none of that serves me, none of that serves my life. None of us. There's my happiness. None of that serves my money goals. None of that serves my relationships. None of that serves my business. Okay. So just look at how do you react when you're having that thought and choosing that thought it's not working. And who would you be? Without that Thought. And the really funny thing is I wrote while I would be free and more confident and it's so funny because I was like doing some journaling on my higher self and it's like, how how would How does like my higher self feel? And she feels free and competence like, Okay, well how can I feel that now and it's so funny that it all came like full circle back to this belief of like, it's not my achieve achievements or lack thereof that are standing in my way of feeling like things are working and feeling free and confident. Or it's not my lack of achievement that's standing in my way of feeling free and confident. And again, it's like achievement according to who like I've achieved so much and like it's so funny how we're always focusing on what we haven't yet yet. That's the key word achieved, as opposed to like what we have so it's like, it all came full circle and what I realized it's like the only thing holding me back from fully feeling that freedom and competence now that I know my higher self feels, is this fun mindset of it's not working because it's a lie. And I'm gonna choose to believe that everything is working. And I'm going to start telling myself, I'm the type of person who trust that it's all working. I'm the type of person who is magnetic and free and competent attracts opportunities all the time. Because it's always working. It's always perfect as it is now. And so, I asked myself, like, Okay, what is the actual truth? Like, I know that it's not working like, we figure it out. It's a lie. It's an illusion. So like, what's the actual truth? And for me, the truth that feels right for me is that like things are working as they're meant to. It's literally just a thought that they aren't just a thought. It's how freeing is it to be like, Whoa, it's not actually it's working or it isn't working. It's just a thought and your definition the meaning you've given to what it means to be working or not working. And I asked myself like, Okay, what would it? What would future me? What would my higher self Tell me about this? About this lie I've been telling myself in future we would future me would tell me you've got this. You're doing everything right. It's fucking working. You can have fun and let it be easy. Let it work for you allow it to work this like it's not working mindset, like, it's almost like we want a wall we don't want it's like there's a part of us that doesn't want it to where we want to wallow and not working. We want to remain the victim so that we can you know, we don't want to put ourselves fully out there. Because if we do, and if things don't go the way we want then it's like we have to then we extinct we're going to experience this like shame towards ourselves. So like, what if we just allowed it What if we could just let it work? What if it all was working and what if you could just love That fucking happened instead of getting in the way. And so I thought also about like, okay, like, what would I tell? What would I tell a friend who was experiences experiencing this and I like bro like, look at all of you, you've accomplished, you've grown so much, you've become a new person, you're ready to let this go. You're ready for your new reality. It's working. It really is this is coming up because you're meant to release it now it's coming up to reveal to you how big thought of a lion is. So that you can finally let this go so that you can finally step into this next level version of you that you've been growing into this it's not working mindset has been coming up because I've been up leveling and expanding my life and my business and my relationship and everything and so many ways. So my brain wants to pull me back into the it's not working mindset so that I can like stay a victim and stay stuck and like stop moving towards this like discomfort of growth, but it's just as uncomfortable To stay in stagnation, the disc, it's like would you rather choose the discomfort of growth or the discomfort of stagnation? Well, I would always rather choose the discomfort of growth. But our brains don't really understand that's what's going on. Our brains are like, Oh, just convince her it's not working, take her back to what she was doing before this, all this new behavior and thinking is too uncomfortable. Let's, let's say it's not working, and let's say stuck so we can stay in our comfort zone. And so I asked myself, like, what am I missing out on by holding on to this idea that it's not working, or I'm missing out on that fully free and happy, confident feeling. I'm missing out on inspired ideas, because my brain is like, has been going in circles and circles and circles of like, what's not working? What am I doing wrong? What do I need to fix bla bla bla bla bla, rather than like, creating space for inspired ideas to come in and creating space to create a and to just live my life and to have fun and this belief is What's keeping me stuck? And it's like, we think we're stuck. So then we believe, oh, it's not working. But it's it's the very it's not working belief that's keeping us feeling stuck. And also what even is stuck. It's just a thought. It's just a belief like what if you're not stuck, what is being unstuck look like? stuck is not real, either. It's all an illusion in our brains, trying to keep us in our comfort zones. So by holding on to this belief, like it, you know, when we hold on to a belief, or a habit or whatever it is, it's because in some way we're benefiting from it right or otherwise we wouldn't be holding on to it. So how I'm benefiting how I was benefiting from this belief is that like, I got I was, you know, I got to remain like, the victim and therefore I was like, giving away my power. I'm not taking full responsibility for my life, I didn't have to take responsibility for my life. If I was the victim and things were just not working like oh, it's not one of her, it's just not working. It's like, I get to avoid the responsibility and I was avoiding the possibility of the other shoe dropping. So if I believed if I let myself believe it's working, if I let myself believe everything is all good as it as it is, then like what if it all crumbles and goes away? And so I think there was a part of me that was didn't even want to face that possibility of the other shoe dropping, which is also a lot and dilution. And it was, I was, uh, it was allowing me to avoid fully putting myself out there. Because if I was stuck in the it's not working. Then I just got to believe it wasn't working, but I believe everything was and then I put myself fully out there and it's like we're looking to avoid that shame of putting ourselves fully out there but like really this whole mindset was holding me back from my full potential and was keeping me stuck even me feeling like this whole not this is not good enough energy and it's like you know it's like these it's like this fear it's I think so many of us have this fear of allowing things to be good allowing ourselves to feel like things are working allowing ourselves to be happy because one What if it doesn't last and two? Will that keep me complacent? Will I lose my drive? If everything is working now then will I lose my drive to strive for better and like again? That's another lie It's like what if what if believing it is working propels you faster towards your goals? If the it's not working mindset is not working for you. Then what have you tried the it is working mindset right? And so What if you believe it's all working? What if you believe that this was coming up because you're ready to be free from this belief? What if you're ready for everything to work? What if it's safe to let it all work? What if like, what if you just experimented with the it is working mindset because it's not working isn't fucking working. So what have you experiment with the mindset that it is. And that will actually motivate you more. Because you will feel more inspired. You'll have this space for inspired ideas you'll be in a better energy of attracting ideas will come to you, opportunities will come to you. Things will feel like they're working and you will attract more of that same energy, that same feeling and it's like, the more we can get in the mindset of it is working. Now the more we are able to live out that reality and belief of like it is working in the more we attract more of what we want. Um, so, yeah, and it's like, what this is the part that like really hit me towards the end of my journaling. It's not like oh my gosh like it's not like all of a sudden I'm going to going to achieve a goal and then then I will deem things to be working and everything will always be working from there on out. If, if the it's if the hard to put this into words, if the like Reality of Things working is always somewhere I'm not. If it's the next milestone or the next goal, then I'm never gonna feel like I'm there anyways, and so that definition of working is a never ending. spiral. It's a never ending not good enough notice. Does that make sense? Hopefully you guys are getting this and Yeah, hopefully it's helping you because I know this is something so many of my clients have struggled with, as well like in our own life, so much of the time, we just want to like, you know, stay in this it's not working mindset because it we get to like continue playing small and like for my clients I just helped them see that like everything is working everything is okay now and it's just our expectation of the way things should be that make us think it's not working now but like the way things should be, is just a thought. It's just a thought and we can let go of that thought that thought that things should be different just makes us feel like shit. So is there any good reason to hold on to that? No, it's time to let it go. So I was thinking, Okay, like what is my new definition of things working? Well, I'm learning and growing. I'm doing my best and The present what I really thought about was like the present is all there is. And in the present, it's always okay. And it's always working because it just fucking is. And I can believe it's working out because it just is it is there is no other way. The only other ways, just thoughts and illusions and beliefs of the way we think things should be or we're like, zooming out to the future or the past and it's like no, like right here right now like, it is working because it is there is nothing else. This is the only thing there is. So you may as well get on board with it is working, or else you're going to be chasing this never ending illusion of this definition you've created of what it means to be working. And it's like, we're chasing something that doesn't exist because we're chasing this feeling of it's working in our external reality and it doesn't come from your external reality, feeling like things are working comes from the inside. It's just your thoughts. It's just your belief. So when you I want you to think about like, what are the what are the new beliefs that you want to adopt? Like, what are you? What is the mindset that you're ready to step into what is the mindset that's going to allow you to feel good now and feel happy now and by doing so I attract only more of that. And so, for me, what comes up is that the beliefs that I am choosing to step into now as everything is working for my highest good, only good can come from this it is safe to let it work and to believe it's working. That will only attract more of it working. And everything I do brings me closer to achieving my goals. It's all adding up to exactly what I want. I don't need to I don't need to hold on to the lie that it's not working in order to motivate myself to grow and move forward. It's like Actually, that's keeping me stuck. So I'm choosing to step into this energy of like, what if it's all working exactly as it's meant to? And like, if everything I was hoping to achieve I achieved in three months, six months or a year from now, like, would I care? And will I look back on this time? And will I wish I would have enjoyed it? Or will I look back on this time be like, Oh, you know what, fuck, it was working all along. You feel any means like, even like look back in your life and times where you felt like it wasn't working. And then you look back in you're like, Oh, it was working all along. It's so it is it's just a thought. And it's just a mindset. And it's a mindset that you can choose to tap into now, so I hope this episode helps you. This is like, yeah, some really big breakthroughs for me and I feel like I have like, yeah, just like, shed so much and like, this is Like, yeah, it feels like one of the big final pieces of like really stepping into this like totally new next level for me. And speaking of next level, like, I want to help you get to your next level, I want to help you step into the version of you who who does believe it's working and who attracts more of that energy and who can really get out of all of the overwhelm and overthinking and the it's not working and really step into just feeling your best so you become magnetic to more freedom and success and abundance. So I would love to help you with that. I have a few spots open in my one on one coaching program. And this is for women who are ready to manifest a life they're completely in love with just by being themselves and having fun. And so what you're going to get with one on one coaching is that includes six weekly one on one calls with me over the span of three months, you're going to get amazing journaling prompts, so I kind of like talk to you through some of the journaling I did today, but you're gonna get even better ones even more amazing, amazing amazing journaling prompts to help you rewire your beliefs tap into your higher self, all that good stuff, you're going to get powerful energy healing rituals, I do tapping and meditations and other amazing healing modalities with my clients. And this is like the best thing ever, you're going to get unlimited voxer access with me between session so like for 90 days, you're going to be able to send me voice messages and text messages whenever you want. And get support every single day of this amazing, amazing magical like up leveling a journey. And then this really, really cool bonus that I just added because I am in training to become a certified hypnotherapist. So all of my one on one clients are going to get a customized hypnosis designed to imprint the vision of your dream life designed to imprint this next level version of you the version of you that you want to become. It's going to imprint that into your subconscious mind. So you You can start stepping into that and feeling that reality now. So if this sounds like you if you are tired of settling for mediocre and you're ready to create a life that's actually aligned with your soul and you're tired of this, like what am I supposed to be doing with my life and you know looking at other people and thinking to have it all figured out and just like feeling discouraged and like spiraling in this like self doubt and overthinking if that's you like this coaching program is going to change your life like you're going to be able to step into the best version of you you're going to feel aligned with your purpose and so much more confident in who you are. You're going to feel fulfilled because you're going to be achieving the goals you want solver impossible for you in a way that feels easy and fun. And while in the in between of the of the goals that you have not yet achieved, you're going to still feel competent, IPS and like everything is working like I want to help you step into this next level version of you. So if you're interested in working with me just go to magnetically you att.com slash coaching and you can read about all the details there. And you can apply I have everyone apply because it's very I don't know if exclusive is the right word. But yeah, it's kind of a it's an exclusive program. It's really only for like, high vibe women who are ready to invest in themselves and get out of their own freaking way and do the deep inner work in order to transform their minds and their energy and their life. So if you are ready to say yes to this next level, go to magnetical UI comm slash coaching and you can fill out your application now. Thank you so much for listening. I love you guys. I will see you on next episode.

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